Holy shit.... CHRISTIANS!

So yesterday afternoon I found myself running out to the local psuedo-Wal-mart to get some study flip cards so I could make up for ignoring 3 months worth of grammar lessons. Guess what I see at the back gate of the school?

THE GIDEONS!!!!

Yep, two Japanese gideons were hanging out, passing out green guide books to the students. When I came back to the school I went back to the teacher's room and made sure to involve myself in a centuries old Japanese tradition: harassing Christians.

I explained that there were people passing out bibles at the back of the school, and that in a strongly secular nation like Japan this could be viewed as highly creepy. Christians are a VAST minority here. After all, we live in the area of Japan where a TON of Christians were killed, and Yatsushiro even has "secret Christian tombstones", which I've seen in books but unfortunately not in real life. I'm all about graves though, and as much as I like Japan, I find their graves boring. In Christian cemetaries you have the benefit of knowing that there is a rotting body/possible zombie under the ground, waiting to come back to life and choke your ass.

(Ahem.)

So yeah, the story here is you can't get away from those bible-sneaking Gideons. They will hunt you down to Kyushuu and make you dismiss their religion. What determination!

Good article on declining birthrate and its attendant side-effects

Attn. Japanese people: Start listening to Al Green.

Episode 13: I almost got laid at a hospital this week.

I'm COMPLETELY serious.

Links a plenty!

OK, here's the problem: I've been sick. I've been busy. I've been run ragged. So I haven't really updated. I'm basically taking a self-imposed slowdown so that I can pull my head out of my ass and function in some way again (aside from stealing an hour or so a night to watch Arrested Development on DVD), and in the meantime let me hit you with the lizz-inks.

Steve Albini audio lecture. Cool video from one of the best record engineers in the world.

Buddyhead.com mp3 list. Good stuff. Cool demos from Pleasure Forever too, who were one of my college favorites and who still get a spin now and then at the house.

Vinyl Mine. A music-obsessive slowly but surely puts up his shit on mp3 as he converts from Vinyl to digital. Dig!

MC5 Kick Out The Jams video.

Video of the German group Can. Shit kinda rules.

1978 Japanese Spiderman episode. Subtitled, even!

Weekend fun for me:

Kagoshima City tourist guide.

Live from Camp Sick Day.

Ok, so I'm sick. Not sick enough to exclude a Rocket From The Crypt reference in the title of today's post, but I still took a record one and a half sick days this week to recuperate before returning to work, and even now I'm feeling a little winded, funny, and groggy. My teacher was practically running to the teacher's room on the way back from class and asked me to hurry. Hey man, I've got enough lung butter going right now to float the queen Mary... hang on for a minute.

Regardless, I'm well enough now to show up, even though I can't, um, breathe. Nevertheless, this means that this week's podcast is off until I stop sounding like I belong in an iron lung. Too bad too, because I have really funny stories. Perhaps I'll record tomorrow instead.

And on to links:

More buildings condemned in Kumamoto. THANKS KIMURA!

Guide to British English. Because I'm sure all of my friends from the UK are tired of explaining shit to me. Granted, I won't talk like this, but it'll help me understand it. Now if only I could learn 'em something from DJ Screw.

The meaning of "Walk it off." German master filmmaker Werner Herzog gets shot during an interview and shrugs it off with "it was not a significant bullet." After hanging out with Klaus Kinski's crazy ass, not much can scare you. Video is here. Now I feel like a wuss for being sick.

Adding awesome to industry, Werner pulled Joaquin Phoenix (aka "You don't look like Johnny Cash, but you brought the heat in that flick, yo!") from a car wreck last week.

(By the way, if you're yet to see a Herzog film, you should get on the horse man. One of the few directors I've ever seen that makes me feel hopeful and sad at the same time. Aguirre: The Wrath of God will crush you, and Fitzcarraldo will bury you.)

New fave internet radio station?

Old on-air hip-hop mix tapes from the UK. Some dude is putting his collection up as time goes by.

Japanese internet group suicides double. Holy shit is that disturbing.

Information on freelance apartment guarantors and leaving the country. In honor of my friend who got deported and my other friend who just... left.

Have a safe weekend.

Sick.

Yeah. So while I do enough sucking, coughing, choking, and ingesting to make Jenna Jameson and David Crosby look like Mormon missionaries... have some links.

Dave Chappelle on Oprah.

It's mine.

Cardinale. This band is from Austin. They are ruling me this year.

I get emails...

But this one takes the cake by topic alone!

"If you cum with Spermamax on July 4th, people will take it for the firework."

Cum1ng like a g1ant 1$ trendy; Spermamax can help you with it.
The kid$ @re our future, Spermamax will help you produce them.
You worry of not having descendants,
Spermamax can help you.

TELL ME you're not laughing at that shit. I'm sick, this girl just dumped me, and two of my best friends just left the country and I'm still stoked on that.

"Take it for the firework!"

Big Daikon: A clearinghouse for sad, unfunny bastards

Why this site and everybody on it can suck my dick:

Post 1:

"So like a lot of you, I send money home. Mostly because the interest rate kicks far more ass there, and if I have it hanging around here it just burns a hole in my pocket.

But here's my question: what's your preferred method of getting money BACK from home if you need some extra scratch? Have a family member send you a traveler's check? Western union? Hide it in the corpse of a loved one?

I wrote my bank and they said "you should have it wired transferred to us." Great moments in email comprehension, eh?"

Post 2:

Evin Relocation wrote:
So like a lot of you, I send money home. Mostly because the interest rate kicks far more ass there, and if I have it hanging around here it just burns a hole in my pocket.

But here's my question: what's your preferred method of getting money BACK from home if you need some extra scratch? Have a family member send you a traveler's check? Western union? Hide it in the corpse of a loved one?

I wrote my bank and they said "you should have it wired transferred to us." Great moments in email comprehension, eh?

"This thread is now about using lvl 1 alts in Warcraft to act as a bank and sell things on the AH without anyone knowing it's you selling it
Discuss"

...

Here's hoping you get fired, fuck tard.

I get comments...

" Anonymous said...

thanks for the earth link
id suck yr dick for more earth

7:26 PM"

If you're a girl and you don't have anything that kill me or stick with me like luggage, I've got a lot of Earth rare stuff, live shows, and bootlegs.

If not, well, uh, good luck.

NEXT:

"Sequential Sheik said...

two words EV-pop filter. other than that, stay sick bro."

Holy shit, it's The Ronin King roadie SS, or as I call him "the man who made me quit music." What's up dude?!?!?

There were some other good ones too, but we have an archive for a reason. New episode coming soon.